Loneliness

Loneliness

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

“Loneliness is a complex and usually unpleasant emotional response to isolation or lack of companionship. Loneliness typically includes anxious feelings about a lack of connection or communication with other beings, both in the present and extending into the future. As such, loneliness can be felt even when surrounded by other people. The causes of loneliness are varied and include social, mental, emotional or even physical factors.

Research has shown that loneliness is widely prevalent throughout society among people in marriages, relationships, families, veterans and successful careers.[1] It has been a long explored theme in the literature of human beings since classical antiquity. Loneliness has also been described as social pain—a psychological mechanism meant to alert an individual of isolation and motivate them to seek social connections”

There you have it.

Loneliness.

The definition as brought by Wikipedia.  I’m thinking everyone can relate to one or more of those things at times. If I sound selfish in this blog- please forgive me for that.

No one knows loneliness as I am feeling right now. But there is solace in knowing that many are lonely at this time. That is the only true comfort for me -knowing that others are there and have been there too. You see I am truly alone right now. My feelings have gone from desperation to knowing that there is only true comfort in God. That’s the truth. Because when you are truly alone, for whatever reason, it is just you and God. The feeling, if any have felt it, when we realize our death.

The time when it is just me and God

I have lost a true friend who has been released into the hands of the Lord our Savior Jesus Christ. And it was her time, clearly, but for me, she was the only true companion I have had lately. Weird as it was, she was a widow whom I befriended. No one would have ever believed it, but I can still remember the first time I visited her after her husband passed. Wondering what I was doing there and why I had gone. After each day went on and our relationship grew, I know what I was doing. I was lonely and so was she; we had each other to share with . And she was 94 years old when she passed yesterday. The first few years after she lost her husband, she talked of him all the time. But the last few years, she talked about everything else under the sun. We had great talks. I think of the times I had to yell because she didn’t have a hearing aid (which she finally got) and the times that we just sat together and would hold each other, the tears, although few, were there.

She was a true friend and someone I could call any time and go see. She didn’t drive. But that was ok. She couldn’t see real well, but she always knew I was approaching her. She had good days and bad days. That was ok. I was there through it all. Really. No one will ever know how precious the time we spent together was. No one but her, me and God. No one will ever know the capacity which we shared so many valuable moments. I will cherish each and every one of them, and It will be something I think about and remember each time I think to call her or go by. I will miss Hanna Linkous with a deep passion in my heart soul and mind. But this ultimately will be ok, because I know she is where she needs to be. With the man she spent her life on this earth with, in the arms of the ever loving God. This blog could be real long, and it would never do our relationship justice. But it is here in my heart, all the times, and places and people. It was beautiful and it has ended. Sad for me, not for her.

Life goes on and I must heal. But I will always remember you Hanna and the love you brought to my heart. Two of the last things she said to me were,” I love you very, very, very much” as she caressed my face with her feeble little hand, and ”I’m ready to go home”  and img_0037 she did  just that.  Thanksgiving Day 2016.

RIP Hanna, I love you very, very, very much!

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